When visiting home, Mommy said something that sorta jarred me. She mentioned her age. “Blah blah…when you’re almost 60…blah blah.” That phrase snapped my brain like a rubber band. My mom is indeed almost 60. *shock n awe* Where did the time go? Better question: What happens now?
My mom is never afraid of aging. She’s always been ready–maybe not for the Change or the grays, but she has always maintained liking a few more years. That is awesome for her and it has taught me a very valuable lesson: do not fear the clock. However, with those few more years comes pressure on me–being that I am an only child.
I think about death often. Not enough to be creepy but enough to be semi-prepped for it at any given moment. My parents’ death is no exception. Hearing Mommy say that she was almost 60 jolted that sleeping realization that she won’t stop almost being 60 or 70 or 80. She (nor my dad) will get any younger. They will continuously get older, they will steadily fill their bathroom cabinets with medicines instead of younger smelly things like expensive lotions and soaps. They will constantly add to the vitamins already lined up on the table. Their yearly doctor visits will now happen more frequently and caution to moving things or picking up things will be had.
So, as the only kid, what happens now? Let’s face it, my parents will eventually fall apart. Hell, I’M falling apart (slowly)! How do you plan for an aging parent? Do you plan for them the way you would plan for yourself or your children? Do you just file it away for later?
It sorta scares me, the thought of my parents getting older…Mommy especially. Dads are suppose to be old and grandpa like. Moms? They are suppose to be invincible and never aging. It is inevitable, I suppose, to look up one day and see your Mom as 85 or stop by daily just to ‘check in’ (when really what you are doing is making sure she’s not dead). I guess for now I won’t worry too much about the future part of it all–I won’t keep asking where do we go from here. I will just keep praying for health and making plans to be closer. I just hope they don’t get too much older (and grayer) before I get there 😛